Chronic illness Pain Support

2 Books About Illness in the Headlines

Okay, so I don't know much about his life, his haircut, or his beliefs, but when Steven Cojocaru spoke out a couple of years ago about why his face looked like a pumpkin from the prednisone it caught my attention. Someone in Hollywood actually admitting that (1) they didn't look so hot; (2) they had a (gasp!) illness (3) prednisone makes you gain weight uncontrollably! Hey, it caught my attention.

For all of you who are interested in this Red Carpet interviewer in Hollywood, he'll be on Dr. Phil on January 22: talking about his new book, GLAMOUR, INTERRUPTED, which describes his 2 kidney transplants (he rejected the first one I believe) and his struggles with medication, and more.

This isn't a recommendation. I haven't read the book. But I'm curious enough that I will be setting my DVR to record it and thought you may be interested too.

Other news of interest... Richard M. Cohen's new book, STRONG AT THE BROKEN PLACES: Voices of Illness, a Chorus of Hope.

If you didn't know, Richard is the husband of Meredith Vierra, co-host of the Today Show. Last week they featured people on the show who had a chronic illness and it was done really well... I even wrote Meredith a note on her blog. She tried to interview her husband like any other guest, but at the end of the interview tears came to her eyes.

Lisa

REVIEW: Overcoming Runaway Bloodsugar

REVIEW: Overcoming Runaway Bloodsugar
By: Dennis Pollock
Review by: Lisa Copen

As the director of a Christian ministry for those who live with chronic illness or pain, I was interested in reviewing this book to see if I would find it a practical tool to refer it to the people we serve. It's rare to find a book on blood sugar published by a Christian publishing company. But I also had a personal interest. I have lived with rheumatoid arthritis for 13 years, (since age 24). I gained over 80 pounds over about 6 years of heavy doses of prednisone and other medications. In March 2003 I went lo-carb. 20 carbs a day, to get my blood sugar under control. My weight gain, the diagnosis of my mom with diabetes, and becoming a mom myself (through adoption) was motivation for me to go "cold turkey" and stick to a diet of no white flour or sugar. I lost 80 pounds in 2 years. I didn't eat a single french fry or bite of ice cream that contained sugar.

I found this book to be personable and easy reading (I read it in 2 hours while my son played at a kid's village and I watched him from the table.) And it reflected my attitude and choices that I made in changing my diet and lifestyle (not dieting, but a lifestyle change). So often people would hear I was "lo-carbing it" and give me a lecture on the health risks. But I made wise choices and Dennis Pollock's advice was nearly word-for-word what I told people --it was a series of smart decisions each day that got my blood sugar under control, and thereby helped me lose the weight. Like reaching for a cheese stick instead of a breadstick, eating shaved ice instead of ice cream, having sugar-free syrup in my coffee at Starbucks instead of the regular vanilla. And perhaps that's why I liked this book so much. I had seen nutritionists, dieticians and many others who had no answers for me other than "get off the prednisone." Easier said than done, at the time I wouldn't have been able to walk without it. Lower blood sugar led to weight loss over time, which in turn, reduced some of the flaring of the disease, and I was able to lower the dosages of prednisone little by litte.

Dennis doesn't pretend to be an expert or a doctor. He is "your average guy" who had blood sugar problems, recognized he needed to do something about them, and became a great advocate for himself. He tells how he gained control over it through a series of experiments (like eating something and testing his blood sugar), and the feeling of relief this gave him that what he ate really did make a difference in his body immediately. He --like most of us--wants to live as long as possible, and have good health during our lifetime. There is no guarantee, but the choices we make do help or hinder the odds.

I found this book refreshing, honest, and practical. I am not a fan of the "Bible Cure" books by Reginald Cherry, nor the many health books you will find on your Christian bookstore's "health" shelf. They often promise health or cures if you follow a few tips they've dug out of scripture and then use to prove their point--that God wants us all healthy. And they are making a lot of money telling people that God wants us all well (hmmm. why do we die in the end, do you think then?)

As the director of Rest Ministries, where I see people struggle with illnesses they do not want, and how they do everything in their power to "follow all the scriptural rules" as well as the "health rules"--and still are sick, it's saddening--and angering that friends and professionals still claim, "You could cure yourself if you really wanted to."

Pollack's book is one of the few Christian health books I feel honored to endorse and give my stamp of approval. As far as all of the medical references, I am not qualified to comment on their validity-but I do know that Harvest House is an upstanding, worthy, sincere publishing house that they surely fact-checked this book for accuracy before selling it.

REVIEW: No Small Miracles: Heartwarming, Humorous, and Hopefilled Stories from a Pediatric Chaplain Review

REVIEW: No Small Miracles: Heartwarming, Humorous, and Hopefilled Stories from a Pediatric Chaplain
By Lisa Copen, founder of Rest Ministries, author of
Beyond Casseroles: 505 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend

The loss of a daughter who is simply taking a photo of a blimp. . . giving birth to a child you know will live less than ninety minutes. . .Who would believe these stories could give one hope? Norris Burkes, author of No Small Miracles: Heartwarming, Humorous, and Hopefilled Stories from a Pediatric Chaplain, however, does just that. Through his eyes as a chaplain husband, and father we are given an inside look at the daily joy a someone in his profession can find even in the darkness of the most devastating circumstances.

Burkes has experience as a chaplain who has worked in pediatric chaplaincy as well as a military chaplian. Filled with just the right amount of honest vulnerabilities and even humor, this book reminds us about what is truly important. As one who lives with chronic illness and ministers to thousands who spend countless hours in the hospital, I'll admit that reading more stories about people who suffer is not how I prefer to spend my free time. This book, however, isn't about the illnesses or the pain, but the miracles behind them--the miracles that sometimes come in forms of physical healings, but more frequently as miracles with less glitz: spiritual healings, the healing of relationships, sometimes the gift of peace God gives us as we surrender everything over to Him.

Pain creates many questions:

• Why did this have to happen?
• Does God really care?
• Why do I have to suffer?
• What's the purpose behind all of this pain?

Burkes addresses all of these with both scriptural authority, but real, down-to-earth words from a "regular guy." I especially appreciated his challenge and clarification of the statement we've all heard during difficult times in our life: "God says He won't give me more than I can handle."

Despite my ministry, Rest Ministries and HopeKeepers, which teaches people how to comfort the chronically ill, I find myself in awkward situations when words seem pointless and yet are expected by someone who is hurting and looking for encouragement. I laughed out loud a few times at Burkes' "human" responses to people who needed to talk to a "real person" and not necessarily a "professional chaplain." For example, on page 82 he describes a man who was a heart patient and a former military engineer. When he told Burkes, "I'm not sure I even believe in God," Burkes responded, "That's OK. I'm in customer service, not sales."

Being a chaplain is a calling and it's no secret that chaplains are put into situations on a daily basis where they have the opportunity to comfort and minister to someone in need. But Burkes emphasizes that this gift is not for chaplains alone, but rather all of us are given the chance to reach out to people who are hurting. All of us can hold someone's hand and say, "You can cry with me if you want to."

Burkes' book, No Small Miracles, is not only a gift to chaplains and those in the medical helping profession, but each of us who undeniably will find ourselves sitting next to someone--a friend or stranger--who simply needs hope. This book is a great reminder and guide in helping us find the right words (or no words at all) to point one in the direction of true hope, the Lord Jesus Christ.

"The Nativity Story" book is a comforting read

When I heard that the theater box offices would feature a nativity story this year, my enthusiasm grew as I saw many pastors embrace this story and encourage their congregations to visit the local theater for a reminder of what the Christmas season is all about. Somewhere between looking for the sold-out Elmo doll and debating between XL and XXL PJ's for a friend who you don't want to offend by purchasing the bigger size, you can take a break and sit back and watch the young, Oscar-award winning actress Keisha Castle-Hughes portray Mary, in The Nativity Story. (The film's web site is worth checking out.)

Since my son is three and I've not had the chance to see a movie in the theater for months that does not involve animated cars or animated mice who are living in the sewer, I grabbed up the book last week at Walmart and read it last night in a 3-hour-sitting.

Perhaps the photos from the movie shoot, available in the middle of the book, gave me an idea of what Mary and Joseph may have looked like, or at least, the significant youth of Mary. Knowing that the book has been published by Tyndale Fiction, and widely supported by Dr. David Jeremiah (of Turning Point Radio and Television Ministries, a Christian broadcaster, author, and the pastor of Shadow Mountain Community Church in San Diego, California) gave me faith in its credibility. In fact, Dr. Jeremiah has a 128-page book out called Why the Nativity?  Bulk church cases available at special discount to help stores form partnerships with local churches--it features 25 questions and answers and 25 Scripture readings to coincide with the Advent season.

My opinion on the book and the hoopla surrounding it?

1--I found the book excellent. It seems to stick to the scriptures rather closely, adding in a lot of the mixed emotions the characters, especially Mary, experienced. There wasn't a book back then called "What to expect when you're expecting"--especially not one "...when you're expecting the Son of God." Mary's natural fears and questions are portrayed as anything that a typical young girl would have, but she is also one of deep faith, who continues to believe that God is in control of the situation and will somehow protect her from those who are evil, as well as those who are just judgmental and rude. Though it's fiction, many parts of it use scripture, hardly putting it into today's terms just to make it an easier read. It had the feeling and passion behind it as the Bible does when we dive into it and not quickly scan through the scriptures.

2--Last week controversy arose (doesn't it always?) when it was announced that the Keisha, 16 years old, who plays the role of Mary, is pregnant with a child conceived after the filming with her 19-year-old boyfriend. As I read the headline on Yahoo I was disappointed that this excuse was provided for Christians to avoid seeing the film because of a young girl's poor choice, as well as frustrated because of the pleasure the liberal media would have in throwing this juicy story out there.

Asked about the film's potential scandal, Jeremiah observed, "You have to remember, these people are actors. I think most intelligent, sophisticated, American people can figure that out, and they're not going to let that ruin or in any way cause them to have concern over the film."

Miss Castle-Hughes "wasn't really Mary; she just played the part of Mary," the California pastor says, "and I don't believe you can hold her responsible for a character that would be, certainly, fitting with the character of Mary in the scripture." Reverent viewers of The Nativity Story "need to separate the reality from the acting," he contends, "and not try to mar the film because the young lady who played the role of Mary, in her own personal life, doesn't live up to the standard that Mary holds in the film itself."

Richard Ross, co-founder of the national abstinence movement True Love Waits, responded similarly in a conversation with Baptist Press, advising Christians not to react to Castle-Hughes and her pregnancy in the way the world would expect them to react, because "to do so is to ignore the model Christ set for his followers."

The Christ-like example, Ross noted, is marked by "gentleness and grace" and aims to point those who stumble toward redemption, forgiveness, and a God of second chances." Boatwright echoed this sentiment, telling Baptist Press that, while Christians obviously do not want to condone sex outside marriage, he hopes they will not be too judgmental of Castle-Hughes.

My own personal opinion is one I have held onto since the scandals involving Mel Gibson: regardless of what one believes (which we will never truly know -- it's between a person and God); when an actor takes a role in which they are an integral part of bringing God's Word to a great amount of people who would not have otherwise seen it, or perhaps not have been touched so dramatically-- such as Mel Gibson did through The Passion of the Christ-- a great responsibility is laid upon their shoulders. And with this responsibility comes a great attack from Satan. It can come in many forms, but we should react with grace and for pray for the person rather than cast stones.

As a leader of a ministry, I fall short every day. I fail--myself, my family, and even God. I'm far from perfect and I humbly thank the Lord that He is able to use my ministry despite my own shortcomings. But even as I am failing, the Lord is working through Rest Ministries, changing lives and increasing His presence among His people. And with that comes attacks--often in my own personal health, spiritual walk, or any other area Satan sees an opportunity to discourage me. Thank goodness my downfalls are not broadcast on the World Wide Web for all to discuss.

The book is a gem. It was a fast read, I got into bed by 8:30 and snuggled up with it and was done in a few hours, feeling refreshed and as if I had spent some time with Mary and Joseph along those dusty trails. And as I looked at my Creche today, I saw it with fresh eyes, imagining poor little Mary having labor pains and clinging to a donkey, as Joseph ran from house to house, banging on doors, searching for a place to stay.

I haven't seen the movie to comment; now I wish to see it more than before to see how the pages of the book come alive on the screen. In today's world--where I still find delight that It's Christmas Charlie Brown still airs annually on network t.v. despite Linus's recitation of scripture about the Christmas story-- I also find hope that such a film can be found at the theaters during the Christmas season, and even a bit of delight in knowing that it's good enough that even Satan is searching for ways to decrease the power the Lord has through it.

Merry Christmas,

Finding Christian Books on Illness

I recently spoke at a Christian writers conference and had the opportunity to talk with an literary agent, in hopes that he may be willing to represent me. You may or may not realize that Rest Ministries has published all of our books ourselves; I do the formatting, get an ISBN #, etc. and upload it to a printer. Ta da. We've got a book. I believe if I put all minstry work aside and diligently approached Christian publishers, eventually I would be able to get some of the books published through traditional means. But I've also seen some wonderful Christian books on illness that end up going out of print in a year --and then the author has to "buy the books back" quick, before they sell out. One has to come up with a lot of funds fast and stack up the boxes wherever one can find space (I'm not the only one who has admitted 3000 books make great luggage racks for visiting relatives.)

With my heart really in ministry, rather than spending the time trying to find a publisher, then wait a year or two for the book to be published, and then have the frustration of being bumped "to the back of the shelf" I've chosen to "self-publish." This way the books can get into your hands fast! And... there is no "middle man." All of the proceeds go directly to Rest Ministries rather than giving 60% to a "publisher." It's literally kept our ministry financial sound.

But... there is a drawback. We're limited in the amount of people we can reach. And of course, there is always the credibility issue of "doesn't a real publisher want you?" Really, I'm past the dream of seeing a book with my name on the bookstore shelf. (Well, nearly over it. I still go and find the books other people have written that have my endorsement on it and get bummed out when they spell my name wrong.) 

But the truth of the matter is when you all read them and write to me about how the books I've written have actually changed your life, I am in total awe at what God has done! Really! When I read my own writing I KNOW it wasn't me that wrote that because some of it actually MAKES SENSE. Plus, I remember writing it in between scrubbing baby spit-up off of my shoulder and coloring my hair. It HAD to be God.

But the opportunity to get the amount of exposure from having books published, and actually having them on the bookshelf at your local Christian bookstore or Borders, can't be beat. Research has just come out that Christians give books as gifts more often (32% compared to 28%), borrow books from the library 3% more (42% compared to 39%) and loan them to friends 4% more (36% compared to 32%) than the general population.  [2005 Christian Book and Consumer Purchasing Report by Ipsos BookTrends research group. ]

So the truth is, we DO buy books! Christians with chronic illness are no exception, in fact, when I was diagnosed I literally drove straight to the Christian bookstore to find something to help me accept that my illness was "chronic" and how to live with this new factor and still be joyful. What did I find? Books that told me illness was my punishment for sins I'd committed or books that wanted to teach me how to "die with dignity."  And where does one even locate these books? In the grief section, stacked up next to books on surviving divorce or widowhood.

In the thirteen years since then, little has changed. Well, I take that back. There is now a "health" section (where logically most people look for books on illness if there is no illness section.) But the books there are all on how to get healed by eating the right foods, reciting the right prayers, praying "hard enough," etc. Step 1, step 2, step 3, presto! Either you are healed or you didn't do it correctly. Go back to the beginning and try again... and again... and again.

If you've read my article on "WARNING: Beware of Bible Cures" I don't need to go into an explanation on my feelings about these dangerous interpretations of theology. (If you haven't read it, I invite you to do so!) But my fear is, what happens to all of the people who return to the bookstore six months later and can't find anything about actually living with chronic illness?  Lord knows, (and He does) that there is a large percentage that simply aren't healed by taking the recommended vitamin or drinking the right muddy concoction. Our world is simply fallen and there will be many of us who God determines He will invite to "share in His suffering" rather than be healed for temporary comfort.

Bottom line is this: I told the literary agent, 1 in 3 (nearly 1 in 2) people in the U.S. have a chronic condition. Which means everyone either has one or likely knows someone who does. He said, "I know this and you know this, but the publishers don't know this..."

Why not? And how can we fix this?

(1) We are buying more books online so our sales aren't really noticed. Bookstore buyers (the owner, manager, etc.) stock the bookstores with books that they see actually going out the door. If we aren't really out there shopping, there is no reason for them to believe that we will come in to buy the book or even if we wil know that it's in stock.

(2) When they do buy Christian books on chronic illness, they put them in the wrong place. They don't know where to put them; in the health section? Death and dying? Illness? Religious section? They are hidden away collecting dust. Clerks don't know they exist (many times after a clerk has told me there is no such thing I will scrounge up a book buried in the back.) They simply are soon taken out of print and cleared off the shelves without ever getting a chance for exposure.

(3) We aren't talking to enough bookstore owners/clerks about what we are looking for. If you can't find the book (or even if you can) go ask where you would find "Christian books on living with chronic illness." When they lead you over to "meditations" or "Bible cure books" say be more specific in your request: "No, I am looking for a devotional book-- there is a big difference between a Christian book and a New Age book."  Most bookstores stock books that they hear their customers ASKING for, so if you can't find it don't get discouraged and just leave. Ask someone.

(4) The books that are in stock are never featured. If you've read a book that you like and want to recommend, mention it to the bookstore owner or buyer. Remind them that a display table would be a great idea during "health events" such as National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week or other health weeks. Tell them if you plan to talk to others about it or recommend it to your support group. Say, "I'm highly recommending this book to a lot of people so I wanted to let you know and make sure it will be avaiable and in a place they can find it."

(5) How else can you help?

• Write to Christian publishers (even email) asking them to consider printing more books on chronic illness. Tell them you are looking for books specifically for those who live with illness; there are many on caregiving, Alzheimer's disease, etc. but too few on how to live with illness/cope/how it impacts the family, etc.
• When you hear someone on the radio talking about chronic illness (I do radio interviews as do many others on this topic) call in when they ask for callers. (The agent told me, yes, but the callers are the very few people who sit at home without anything to do but call radio shows..." "That's not true" I said. "Many call in on their way to work when I do morning shows.")
• Continue to support authors of Christian books on chronic illness. If you do like their book, ask them for a few postcards or flyers that you can share with others.

Have you ever heard of Chicken Soup for the Soul? This is how they went from being a small self-published book to one of the best-selling book series of all time: They asked people to call their local bookstore and say, "Do you have Chicken Soup for the Soul book?"

It's no secret that I will never get rich.  Any income from Rest Ministries goes right back into it to allow us send out some magazines to Katrina victims, to upgrade much-needed software, etc. But my mission IS to encourage those 110 million people who live with chronic illness and I believe one of the best ways of doing this is through books. So, it is my goal to help get as many books into the hands of those who are hurting, that explains that God can offer comfort even in the darkest moments.

Thank you for sharing this dream with me.